There’s a lump in my throat
and all unsaid words feel stuck
I can’t seem to get away
from the pain they create
There’s a hole in my chest
formed by the words you left
they tried to keep me whole
but they were the ones who broke me
Will it always feel like this?
Is there no place I can be free?
If I don’t take them away from me?
Or should I profess them out loud
and not care about the destruction they’ll cause
Once I break the chains from silence?
© Máh Lima
Tacenda are things not to be mentioned or made public—things better left unsaid;
“Appreciate the fact that you are breathing“, you say.
I don’t respond. I am gasping for air beneath my tears. You seem concerned and confused as to how to handle my breakdown. In this situation, we exchange roles from you trying to soothe my shivering body to me consoling you; nodding my head, barely managing an “I’ll be fine.” We both know that fine will not come soon.
On days like these I do not need your logic. I need the warmth in your hands and your chest to remind me that I’m not just “breathing” alone. I need your eyes to convey your love into mine. I need your understanding, not your replies. God sometimes sends people to us when we are drowning, you stand close and unsure of how to offer your hand. Simply open your arms. I will retreat into them, unravel my self back into fragile skin to fill them. Tell me that you are here to pull me back ashore. Stay holding me long after these tears run dry.
– Samihah Pargas
– Instagram : @Shadesofherink