Posted on


Scene: A cool winter night, a guy leaning against a balcony railing overlooking the water, with a lit cigarette in hand

“There’s mistakes and then there’s you” he thought. “It was like getting on a train you know was gonna crash, but were praying for a miracle. You are some combination of my best decision and biggest regret” he said to himself. He felt crazy, talking to himself. But the thoughts had been swimming around in his head for weeks, and finally found their way to his lips. He was thankful for meeting her that fateful day at Yankee stadium when she bumped into him and spilled her beer all over his jersey. She looked up at him after and had this half smile and quickly apologized, and offered to buy him a drink to make up for spilling hers on him. He remembers how they got to talking and wound up wandering around the city afterwards. The conversation didn’t stop, they wound up back here, on this very balcony having coffee watching the sun rise together. She warned him of her nomadic nature, she never stayed in one place too long. They kissed in that cliche movie type scene as the sun was coming up. The next few weeks were a whirlwind, picture perfect time. He was falling hard for her, and she for him. He remembered the exact moment he fell for her. She was eating pasta and had sauce on her chin, he pointed it out, and rather than wipe it with a napkin, she used a piece of bread and then proceeded to eat it, he knew in that moment that he was in love.
She pushed him to follow his passions, which led to opportunities he never would have had before. She warned him about how everything she owns could fit in the back of her car, how she was built to move. How she had picked up and moved to new cities on a whim. But he thought this was different, he could see it in her eyes. A few months went by and things seemed great, but at least once a week she’d repeat her warning. She felt herself getting attached and began withdrawing. One day he woke, and she had left, without a trace, not even a note. All that was left was the ring he got her for her birthday, sitting on his desk. He spent the day going to the places she’d frequent, hoping she was still somewhere to be found. He couldn’t believe it, but he also realized she had been warning him of this the whole time. He thought he could be the exception, thought that was the love he had been searching for his whole life. Maybe it was, he felt things he never had before with her. He was finally happy because he was doing what he loved. None of this would have been possible without her, but this pain of knowing that she wouldn’t be there to share this happiness with tore him apart. He questioned if he was better off before her, living in ignorance of her existence, one where he never took the chances, where he didn’t know what true love felt like and he was ok with that. To have that taste and then have it taken away, it would have been better to have never loved at all. He takes a drag, and looks around, wondering if she’ll ever come back around.

Posted on

My Way

Spent so long following the beaten path
The one lit up with tales of the right way
But I’ve been on this path for years
And I’m nowhere near where I wanna be
So I’m gonna turn here and
Go down that dark trail
And let the fire in me light the way
Tempting me with the easy road
The one that’s been tried and true
But for me that just won’t do
I don’t wanna make it to the other side
With my dreams as the sacrifice

Posted on


I don’t care about this like I once did
Unsure what happened
What snapped
The passion that once roared
Has indifference wrapped around its throat
As I exhale my last cares
Watch them as I go
Suffocating on apathy
There’s a man staring back in the mirror
Watching this all unfold
But he doesn’t recognize me
Maybe one day I’ll jog his memory

Posted on

The Story Goes On

I’ll be patient
I’ll wait
I’ll do whatever it takes
You went that way and I stayed here
But I’ve seen the map, we’ll cross paths again
Until then I’ll
Stay in this land of make believe
Where you didn’t leave
Where next you I still sleep
I don’t know how this story goes
But I know it ends with us happily ever after
Even the most mundane things with you
Are sweeter than any fantasy
I wanna go on but I’m stuck on the page where we first kissed up on that rooftop
I’d say you’re the girl of my dreams
But even she doesn’t compare to you
You are my every wish come true
Every question answered with just one kiss

I’m jealous of the rain that slides down your skin like my lips used to
I’m jealous of the wind that runs through your hair like my hand used to
I’m jealous of the pillow upon which you rest your head when it used to be my chest
The hands on the clock sit still
As I count the moments until the next time
That our story will go on

Posted on

Dear Dreams

Dear Dreams,
I hope you hear my calls
Hope won’t answer
Faith is nowhere to be found
and Doubt won’t leave me alone
Dear Dreams, you’re all I got left
I know it’s been a while since we last met,
but Sleep hasn’t visited me for a while
and I don’t have any other way to get to where you are
so I’m calling out to you

Posted on


Staring at my steering wheel when our song came on
Sitting in traffic backed up on Lake Shore
Backed up like the blood in my veins
because my heart hasn’t had a beat since you left
The only thing getting through are thoughts of you
Sitting bumper to bumper inside my mind
The road paved with good intentions and broken promises
The words I want to speak
Sit single file at the tip of my tongue
Waiting to take their exit
I finally start moving
And just when I pick up speed
I pass by where we first kissed
I collide with the reality
That I’m stuck in place
The world may keep spinning
But I’m not going anywhere

Posted on

Here I Am

Here I am
Taking a look around me
Everything’s the way it’s always been
And that’s how it always will be
Every now and again I get to thinking
About the world outside this little town
So many things I haven’t done
So many places I’ve never been
I’m gonna pack my bags
Grab my keys and just drive
Drive watching the road disappear behind me
Staring down the world in front of me

Continue reading Here I Am

Posted on

Moving On

Everything you gave me
Is in a box burning in the rear view
Driving through memory lane
One last time before I leave it all behind
There’s the coffee shop where met
You walked in it was like a movie scene
Everything faded out of view
The only thing my eyes saw was you
There’s the pool hall where we had our first kiss
The rain was coming down
Looking into your eyes
Continue reading Moving On